The New Beginning

Ok so I finally gave into the blogging trend. Not because of the trend, but more for my own personal growth. I want to be able to look back and see that God has made numerous changes in my life and that I am continuously growing. So this is my new beginning. Our pastor began last week talking about change and how in order to make changes in our life, we have to make the first change that is most important. That change is our priority to place God first in our lives. Ok, so I have heard this before, but for the first time I actually listened and allow God to speak to me. So starting last week I decided to intentionally place him first and begin to let God decide where I am going. As many people know, I am working full time and going to graduate school at Wayland so my life is definitely full. The more important portion of my life is my wife Casey and our twelve month old son Joshua. All I do is to support them and give them the best that I can and that best is God's best. I have joined a "Life Transformation Group" or LTG in which a small group of guys get together to hold each other accountable and encourage one another in our personal walks with Christ. At first I thought this would be like a lot of men's groups I have been apart of in the past. I figured we would read some scripture and pray, but was I wrong. When we first met each of us was given a sheet of paper with all the spiritual disciplines that God has called us to follow. I won't go into detail, but man do I have a lot of things to change!!! So this has been the greatest thing for me because I can actually see what I should be doing on a daily basis that I am no where near doing. Thank you Chris for this wonderful guide. Although it has been a great week with these changes taking place I believe that the enemy is really trying to bring me down to a breaking point. If anyone really knows me then they know my love for music and playing guitar. Although it has been a closet hobby and love of mine, I have in the past year brought it out. I listen to music constantly and play as often as I can, but I have really been down lately. If there is one thing in life I could do forever it would be play my guitar and sing. I know, I know, how many other people have this same desire. We can't all be the Beatles!! No, I do not actually desire to be the Beatles. Actually, I just want to be able to play for people no matter the setting or the number of people. I just want to be able to write songs for the Lord and share them with my brothers and sisters in Christ to encourage them in their own personal walks. There are only two problems, I can't write and I am too shy to play for anyone. This has been a real struggle for me because I feel that I waste my time on these hobbies and get too emotional with my desires. So, tonight I spent a lot of time in prayer asking God to take these desires and that his will would be done. Whether that means that my desires will be fulfilled or that He chooses to remove the desires or use them in some other way. Whatever His decision I know that it will be the right one so I will continue to pray for God's divine will in my life. If you are having any unfulfilled desires and are hurting because of it, I encourage you to seek God and he will satisfy your needs.